From Directing to Coaching: The "Guide" Playbook

tldr; Directives are the siren song of efficiency that actually kill curiosity. If you want a team that thinks for themselves, stop giving them the answers. Today we look at how to build psychological safety, lead with questions, and start creating an environment of empowerment, today!

In my last message, I talked about the Directive Style—that siren song of efficiency that actually acts as a "Checklist Trap," killing curiosity and stalling growth. It feels good to have all the answers, doesn't it? But as discussed, if you're the one approving every minor decision, you aren't leading; you're just creating a bottleneck. If you want a team that thrives even when you're on vacation, you have to stop assigning tasks and start coaching outcomes.

So, how do we actually make the shift? It starts with Psychological Safety. If you just announce on a Tuesday that everyone is "empowered" and expect magic, I suspect you’ll be sorely disappointed. Empowerment is an environment you build. It means celebrating "bad news" as data points rather than failures. When your team knows they won't be thrown under the bus for a failed experiment, they stop asking, "What do you want me to do?" and start asking, "How can we achieve this goal?" You move from being the hero who saves the day to the guide who provides the map.

The most powerful tool in your new "Guide" toolbox isn't a directive—it's a question. Instead of telling your team what to think, you are teaching them how to think. This moves the accountability from your shoulders to the collective wisdom of the group. People support what they help create. When you resist the urge to be the problem-solver and instead become a "problem advisor," you give your team the space to design solutions they actually own.

Leaders try this right now: 

In your next one-on-one or team sync, pick one "problem" and use these three tactics:

• Be transparent: Tell the team that you are making a shift, because you believe EVERYONE will be more successful if you empower the team, rather than rely on you.  Ask for their help.  Ask them to hold you accountable.

• The 60-Second Silence: When a challenge is raised, wait one full minute before speaking. Let the silence pull the ideas out of the room.

• The "What if" Pivot: When someone asks for your permission, flip it. Ask, "If you had total authority here, what’s the first move you’d make?"

• Outcome-Based Briefing: Replace "I need this report by Friday" with "I need to understand our churn drivers so we can pivot. How would you recommend we show that?"

Keep them safe: Make sure your team understands what the guard-rails are. If they know what constraints they have to stay in, and then regularly check in to keep you appraised of their thinking - you will develop a sense of confidence in their ability to solve problems smartly, and they will develop a sense of confidence in their ability to make better and better decisions.

Assess the Shift: After a week of leading with curiosity, assess. Are you seeing fewer "Is this okay?" emails and more "Here is what we're trying" updates? That’s the sound of a team moving from compliance to contribution. What do you need to adjust in your approach?  What behaviors do you observe in your team that you can celebrate?  Have a conversation with your team and gather feedback.  Over time, you may just see the feedback you get from your team can help you be even more empowering!

Team members, you have assignments too:

If your leader shares they are trying to shift away from directive to empowering:

• 
  Bring Solutions, Not Just Problems: When a hurdle pops up, resist the urge to ask, "What should I do?" Instead, try: "Here is the challenge we’re facing, and here are two ways I think we can solve it. Which one aligns best with the outcome we’re chasing?" This proves to your manager that their "Guide" approach is working.
• Embrace the "Dead Air": When your manager uses the 60-Second Silence, don't let the awkwardness force you into silence, too. Use that space to speak up, even if your idea isn't fully baked. 

• Request Outcomes, Not Tasks: If your manager accidentally slips back into directive mode (it happens!), help them pivot by asking for the "Why." Try saying: "I can definitely get this report done, but can you help me understand the ultimate business outcome we're aiming for? I might have a more efficient way to get us there."

• Give Real-Time Feedback: If you feel the psychological safety increasing, tell them. A simple, "I really appreciated having the autonomy to own that project last week," reinforces their new behavior. Leadership is a lonely journey; knowing their "unlearning" is making a difference for you helps them stay the course.

Keep your leader informed - Make sure you understand the constraints and boundaries you have to stay within. Be transparent and keep your leader appraised of your ideas and your progress along the way. They are counting on you to not only be creative and productive, but to be safe. Help them be confident in you by being transparent.

The Bottom Line: Transformation is a two-way street. If your leader is trying to move from "Commander" to "Coach," they are essentially handing you the keys. The best way to support them is to show them you’re ready to drive toward the destination together.

Changing an environment for a team to feel safe takes time and care. We might stumble as we learn this new rhythm, and that’s okay. I’ve said it before (but I’ll say it again) transformation isn't a software update; it's a journey of learning and unlearning. Be brave enough to let go of the steering wheel and trust the people you hired to drive.  What’s stopping you?

We all win together.

Coach Dan